i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
