Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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