Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
