We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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