Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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