yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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