I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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