The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
