He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
