if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
