i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
porn star boner night. come get it.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize