This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
