when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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