anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
