No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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