Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
