For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
