I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
