Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize