If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
