Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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