No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
