I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
