rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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