glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
