he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
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