their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
