Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
