I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
