Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
