You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
