Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
foreskin is a definite game changer
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
do nipples grow back?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
