He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
