i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
where are my eyebrows?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
