I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
