Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Randomize
