she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
