My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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