I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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