We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
