Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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