Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
