dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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