And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
