redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
