So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
