She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
