I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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