He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize