I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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