There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
